This week, I will provide five key strategies for handling challenging conversations during divorce. Managing difficult conversations in divorce is crucial for a healthier process. Effective communication minimizes conflict, fostering cooperation and smoother resolutions. I will show you proven strategies for addressing emotions, exercising restraint, and cultivating a positive approach. With these techniques in mind, you will make giant strides toward promoting understanding and facilitating a more amicable separation for everyone involved. My overarching goal is to empower you to navigate emotionally charged conversations with resilience and positivity. Following these steps can lead to more constructive and peaceful interactions.
Whether you're considering divorce, transitioning through divorce, or trying to figure out what's next after the ink is dry on all of the papers, you may still be struggling with difficult conversations that come up along the way. Difficult conversations at work, with your children, with their other parents, with any professionals that you're working with. And today I will share with you five things that can help you show up as your best self.
1: Honor the emotions that you are feeling
So the difficult conversation is coming up and you're feeling aggravated, angry, frustrated. Honor those emotions. Listen to those emotions. Lean into those emotions and then decide to change them. And decide to go into that difficult conversation in a more positive optimistic, open way. So honoring your emotions is very important.
2: Exercise
Before a very difficult conversation situation. Some exercise, some thinking while you're walking or biking or on your peloton. It helps. Physical exercise helps your whole mind, body, and soul, and it can help you to show up in a better way.
3: Create a time limit
If you're going into a difficult conversation and you know that it's scheduled for one hour, then you can let everyone know that in one hour the conversation has to end because you have another scheduled appointment to attend. During and throughout the conversation, especially if it's a longer one, with a lawyer, your mediator, or a professional person, that conversation can get challenging sometimes. Take breaks. You're allowed to say, I need a five-minute break. Stand up, walk out of the room, go outside, go to the restroom. Walk around the block. Give yourself 5 minutes. It will shift your mindset. It will create some positive energy inside your body and self and bring you back to the table in a better state.
4: Before the conversation, decide who you are going to be during that conversation
Are you going to be an upset, emotional, crazy person? Are you going to be bothered by the same old things that have always been bothering you? Or are you going to decide to show up and maybe when you're feeling bothered, when you're feeling highly emotional, when you're ticked off, decide to be a little quieter or just be quiet and you're going to show up more positive. Again, be more open, and listen more than you speak. Hear what people are saying and try to look at things from another person's perspective. It's not easy, but the alternative is the way that you've always been doing it, which is not working. So it's time to make a change. Go into the conversation, open to hearing and listening to what other people are saying. And you can say, “I'm going to take that information home with me and give it some consideration and I will let you know by this time”. So rather than being reactive during the conversation, be quiet and think about how to create something better.
5: breath work and smiling
Before going into a difficult conversation, look into a mirror, smile, and think about all of what you're grateful for. And feel that. And then get into the breathwork. Breathe four in, hold for four, four out, hold for four. That's box breathing and doing that will calm your nervous system. You will feel more neutral, more peaceful, and more relaxed, and do this throughout the meeting. It can make a big difference. Especially when you feel the anxiety growing inside of you. Breathing helps.
If you think divorce is the best option for you and your family right now, you may be feeling overwhelmed, and sad. This is a difficult time. I've created a free mini-course that might help. I want you to know that you are worthy. You are loved and you are perfect just the way that you are.
Wendy
xoxo
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